Football Parents' Resolutions for 2014

#3 Parenting Plan: Divorced parents should get on the same page with scheduling and expectations. There is a reason why the courts call it the “best interests” standard when hashing out custodial arrangements – it is what is in the “best interest of the child, not the parents. I see the same problems every season with co-parents not communicating with each other – the player shows up embarrassed because he only has half his football gear between custodial transfers, or a parent routinely drops the player off late to practice, or a parent removes the player from the team 3 games into a season to teach their ex a “lesson.” If the kid loves playing sports, then the parenting plan should, as best as possible, work around the athletic schedule regardless of how toxic the post-divorce relationship is between the “adults.” First map out the athletic schedule the best you can and then create a co-parenting plan works around those sports commitments (not the other way around). As for child support, youth sports is an extracurricular activity so it falls outside of what is considered a “necessary” educational expense. Therefore, expenses for youth leagues, summer camps, personal trainers and coaches, etc must be negotiated between the parents based on their willingness and ability to pay. Again, be flexible and keep the best interests goal in mind. One anecdote I like to share with parents at the beginning of every season is Alec Baldwin vs. Kim Basinger. After a 9-year marriage, they waged war on each other with an 8-year custody battle, involving $3M in court costs and legal fees, and 90 + court proceedings. Who benefited from that?